M. Ihasz


Italy Dreams


I. Dreamed I

Dreamed I was mentally challenged and caused a boat accident

Dreamed I was training as a doctor and I was practicing first aid on a boat

Dreamed I was living on some sort of boat attached to other boats or in a harbor full of other boats… we all seemed to live on boats

Dreamed I needed three stamps on a piece of paper for my family to stay in the country (?)

Dreamed I was some kind of camp counselor or something

Dreamed first that C-- was in two car accidents and somehow got cancer as a result

Dreamed it was some kind of religious holiday, though it might have just been Halloween

Dreamed my cousin J-- cut my hair when I wasn’t looking. Joke was on her, because it looked really good



II.  (1) We Were Just Talking

I said, “D--, get OUT of my bed.” And he said, “Relax! It’s fine.” I was really bothered by how hairy he was and noticed he had grown to look a lot like the ghost of Christmas Present from the Muppet version of A Christmas Carol

I spent dinner telling the people at my table how devout I was

They weren’t even normal kidnappers, just a family. J-- managed to make a phone call and was trying to act normal, but I grabbed the phone and shouted “We’ve been kidnapped!!”  They didn’t do anything to me for it, because I played it off like I was kidding,
even though I’d clearly been kidnapped

and I said, “she’s sixteen!” And he looked embarrassed. (She’s actually almost eighteen)

“I haven’t seen my dad in years. He’s old, I imagined he was just living by himself in a shack somewhere… I had no idea he’d do this.

(“we” being the people I was apparently on a school trip with. L-- was there, and O-- brought his dog)

I don’t remember much, but I remember walking in to the auditorium and a guy asked me if I wanted to cook something, and I told him I was the director

Another clown midget went up, and he had really teeny feet, and I commented on it, and the one I was talking to, said, “They probably started him too early.” That made sense, I guess



II. (2) Party

I tried to make a speech and someone cut me off and made a speech on my behalf, then A-- was supposed to sing “Sweet Caroline” while M-- played the violin REALLY terribly and A-- forgot the words.  We helped her out, but she didn’t make it though the song without someone saying, “This party sucks!!” and everyone left.  For the rest of the dream, I kept bumping into people who were dressed for some sort of big, fancy event and being asked, “What about the party?”



III. The Idea Of A Double Sail

The idea of the double sail is that it’s
actually powered by waves.
Instead of a “regular” sail,
where you only get half the waves because it doesn’t recover quick enough,
the double sail gets all the waves because
while one sail is recovering, the other gets the next wave.
As a result, you go quite fast through the water

There was a clock with a whale on it that said “All ashore who’s going ashore” that hung by the dock



IV. Trauma

Three chairs
were in the water
around the table
and three were
on the dock.
I was afraid that
if I sat in the water, I
couldn’t escape if
something happened,
“like last time.”
I seemed to
be afraid of
one of my family
becoming possessed.
The table was
set with
grapefruit spoons and
very pointy forks 



V. (1) Part Of The Prize

The prize was upstairs, and it was a chocolate bar.
There was a wallet next to the chocolate bar, however,
and it had a E50 bill in it. I took both,
reasoning that they wouldn’t leave their money at the end of the maze
unless they wanted it to be part of the prize



V. (2) Fuzzy Math

3 hours, 4 hours then three more hours (does not equal 12!)

three stamps on a piece of paper

a voice came over a loud speaker and told us that five people had broken into the building.  At first we thought someone had seen the two boys climbing

I ran to the phone to call 112 (the police number in Italy… I don’t know how I remembered)

– and they were in my sister’s class and the service was in 45 minutes, and I was late!



V. (3) Misunderstockings

I was at a department store for one reason or another, and
was snatched up to help some older lady with her shopping.
She was a lot of fun, but was somehow under the impression
I was a former student of hers and insisted I help her find a nice outfit.
As she went into the dressing rooms, she asked me to get her
some black stockings.
I thought to ask, “Regular or ribbed?”
as if it was a condom or something, and some guy just went,
“She has no idea. You might as well be talking to her about the internet.”
That made total sense to me. I went to find her stockings,
but got distracted by some of my friends and we were in a very crowded submarine when I woke up,
confused and hungry



VI.  I Was

I was dating this bro-type guy

I was getting married but, as usual for dream world, I realized mid-party (which happened before the wedding) that I didn’t know who to

I was hanging out on some sort of pier

I was running away/moving away

I think I was ten also, and we were dating

I tried to find the button to turn off his jacket

and we lost control of the car and plowed over a few gravestones

They wanted me to take a picture of them, but I couldn’t get my hands out from in front of the lens

I was in a commercial. It was supposed to be funny, apparently I was a girl on a date with a centaur and he was bringing me to his house. The commercial continued, or I continued with it, when I was really interested to explore his house. It was a modern design, but made of grass and dirt and hills. There were props everywhere, like some magazines on a coffee table that were centaur spoofs of real magazines, with funny titles and cover articles, but they were glued all together. I met his mother, also

I was following the story of a gay guy but seeing it through his eyes

I was living on the Grand Canal in Venice, but it hadn’t always been and I remembered when it began raining and the flood came

I was out playing soccer with some Albanians, then we went swimming

I was some kind of Spanish-type dancer, and there was also a Real Estate agent woman,
some kind of farmer, a mother, and me and this rebel-kind of Italian or Spanish guy were all kind of trying to kill one another, but me and the rebel guy had some kind of Fatal Attraction thing going on

I was woken up by the rain






Sir Gawain and the Green Knight
A translation

Lines 1-19 : The Brothers Gossip

Since the siege and the assault was ceased at Troy,
The boys brightened, and Brent, to his brother [Breyton], asked:
“That Turk on the Treason Train -- the worst -- was he tried for his treachery? The truest on       Earth?”
“That was Ennias (the asshole!) and his snobby family.”
This, said with depressed prowess, as [Ennias’] patronage had become
Well-known, of all that is well-known in the West Isles.
“He swiped riches from rich Romulus of Rome
With a great bobbulance that burst his own britches at first,
And then his own home! And then his hat.”
Tirius and Tuskan’s tale then begins, and
Langaberde, in Lombardy, flips houses
And is out for the French blood of Felix Brutus
(On money borrowed from Breyton, which he settles with wine)
Where we were woken, and wondered,
By a series of hats without brims
And were often between bliss and blunder with
Full skins of sky-flung sin.



Lines 20 - 36 :  Let Me Tell You Of Arthur

The Queen of England was begged by this burned wretch --
A bold Briton, daring, beret held aloft, --
That money turns to time, that then passes,
And that more perils on him had fallen
Then on any other that I’ve written about yet; sin passed its time.
But of all the kings England has had,
It was Arthur that was the handiest, so I’ve heard it told;
For as a hunter, in earnest, I have to show
That over six summers, men were led on
An outrageous adventure of Arthur’s wonders.
If you listen to the tale but a little while,
I shall tell it as it is, and as I, in turn, heard;
As it was said and spoken,
A story still and strange,
With letters all locked in, as
It has been told in this land so long.


Lines 37-59 :  All Is Well In Court On Christmas

This King lay at court on Christmas
With many lifelike Lords and Ladies of the best
(I reckon) of the Round Table, all so rich and proper
With rich and arresting reckless remarks.
The tournament talks, in time, fooled many --
Just fooling dear, wise, gentle Knights
That no one cared to invite to court
Was not what carols were made of.
The first waltz lasted a full fifteen days
With all the meat and merriment that the men could advise.
Such glamor and glee were glorious to hear.
They dined all day and danced all night, and
All were happy in the halls and the chambers
With the Lords and Ladies (at least, those not lost).
All was well in the world, and days waned with the salmon, and
All the most kind Knights, under Christ’s solute,
And the love-craziest Ladies that ever lived,
And the calmest King ever at court.

For all this was fair for folk in this first age:
The happiest under heaven,
A king, highest man in a while.
His were now much nearer to new
And so hearty here on the hill.





Process Notes.

Sir Gawain and the Green Knight -- A Translation

The Elusive Middle English need not be elusive much longer. For complete and entire understanding of the blurry/bleary passages muddling the mind from the pages of a would-be favorite tome, one must simply begin with the basics of language, the building blocks of communication, and some staunch decision-making on the part of the reader. Every foreign character, unfamiliar adverb, and archaic reference is an invitation to play a game of free association until the narrative is revealed.

Italy Dreams -- Sogni di Italia

Si, stavo dormendo. Si, ero ubriaca. Si, si tutto tutto vero.